Thursday, April 23, 2009
time out
I'll be maintaining radio silence for a while. My husband's father died today, so we'll be heading up to Spokane in the next day or two.
My father-in-law's health had been in steep decline for the past couple of years, with advancing Alzheimer's. Last fall he was moved into an assisted care facility, and almost a month ago he had a massive stroke that put him into a nursing home. Over the last couple of days, his vital signs became steadily weaker. I don't know for sure, but I don't think he was conscious at the end.
I've written about it before on my blog, that he was not an easy person to love, or even to like. None of that matters now, though. My husband's relationship with his father was strained, and in his usual way he's trying to be efficient and organized, getting the car ready for the trip, making phone calls, etc. I try to gently remind him that while he may not be feeling acute grief, he's still under stress, and I will be at his side while he goes through this. I'll be bringing several bags full of knitting, and just be the embodiment of Elizabeth Zimmermann's advice "knit on with confidence through all crises" (paraphrasing).
So, when the dust settles and we can get back to routine, I'll be back. Here is a picture of a flowering tree just over the back fence in our neighbor's yard. I just like to look at it.
My father-in-law's health had been in steep decline for the past couple of years, with advancing Alzheimer's. Last fall he was moved into an assisted care facility, and almost a month ago he had a massive stroke that put him into a nursing home. Over the last couple of days, his vital signs became steadily weaker. I don't know for sure, but I don't think he was conscious at the end.
I've written about it before on my blog, that he was not an easy person to love, or even to like. None of that matters now, though. My husband's relationship with his father was strained, and in his usual way he's trying to be efficient and organized, getting the car ready for the trip, making phone calls, etc. I try to gently remind him that while he may not be feeling acute grief, he's still under stress, and I will be at his side while he goes through this. I'll be bringing several bags full of knitting, and just be the embodiment of Elizabeth Zimmermann's advice "knit on with confidence through all crises" (paraphrasing).
So, when the dust settles and we can get back to routine, I'll be back. Here is a picture of a flowering tree just over the back fence in our neighbor's yard. I just like to look at it.
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((Hugs)) Sorry for your loss. Doesn't matter how strained the relationship, it's still hard. Have a safe trip. :)
(((Hugs))) echoing Cindy... a loss is still a loss and is still hard. Strained relationships can bring the added grief of might-have-been. Be gentle with yourselves and know that we're all here ready to help if you need anything.
Losing anyone who's played such a major role in your life is hard. In some ways, I think it's harder if you didn't have a great relationship. Condolences to you and your husband.
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