Wednesday, June 06, 2007


Cheap thrills

Nope, it's not that Big Brother and the Holding Company album from 1967 which launched the career of Janis Joplin, (CAN YOU TELL I'M OLD?!) --it's also what I'm having with my inexpensive yarn! Here's a taste of what I've been up to:

Fetching Around

Because these little fingerless mitts are such an underground hit where I work, I turned out another pair for a chilly-handed co-worker. I used Bernat Satin, an ackrylic which squeeked *only a little* on the needles, but is a nice Aran weight and feels very soft. That's my own hand doing the modeling. I cropped the pic so you wouldn't have to look at my forearm with its dense crop of freckles--get me some fade cream, stat--and I also put on some nail polish, just for you.

Love Those Cotton Blends

Being a big girl, I'm a devoted fan of this book , which touts the use of natural fiber blend yarns in making plus-size fashions. The synthetic added to the wool, cotton, alpaca or what have you lightens the weight of the item, keeping it cooler, which is nice when I constantly have the 21st-century version of hot flashes (e.g. "power surges",) and also keeps the garment from sagging and/or stretching. That said, I'm happily stitching away on a comfort shawl in cotton/acrylic which I am enjoying so much I Just Might Have To Keep It:

Woohoo, extreme closeup! This is TLC "Cotton Plus" from Coats & Clark in "Jazz" colorway. Just doing double moss stitch. Perfect for a mindless, TV-watching stitchathon. I'm not one for prime time viewing, but I did treat myself to a pay-per-view last night--"The Queen." Loved it--just the portrait of a strong woman I needed to see.

No, No, Ten Times No

I was raised to be a "good" girl--which means compliant, not making waves, putting being liked above all other concerns--and of course that way of living never got me anywhere. I'm still in the process of reprogramming my thinking, and learning to say no when something isn't working for me. The problem is, sometimes I go overboard, maybe because I was invisible as a child and sometimes I still think I won't be heard.

In early February, I put myself in therapy for support and assistance in dealing effectively with my teenager. As the work went on, however, even though things have settled down considerably on the home front (despite the behavior I described in my last post) it became clear that this is not the therapist I want to work with long-term, or in fact ever again. Now, I put it to you: what kind of therapist is so inattentive that she has to be constantly reminded of the particulars of your deepest, darkest life trauma? That and other incompatibilities made it overwhelmingly clear to me that I needed to end the association. I tried to. Several times. But each time, her arguments that she was a good therapist and I had to give her a chance would win out. So today, I mailed her a letter in which I gave her an unequivocal no, No, NO:

June 5, 2007

Dear Dr. _________:

This is to notify you that I have decided to terminate therapy with you. I will not be returning to your office. Please accept this letter as my stated refusal to pay any further missed appointment charges. In the interest of protecting myself, this letter bears the seal of a notary public.

I have been trying to tell you for some time now that you simply are not the right practitioner for me. Other than a few, negligible improvements in my personal and family life since I entrusted myself to your care, the benefits I expected to receive from your counseling have fallen far short of my expectations. As your client, I put my utmost effort into the success of our work by continuing to attend sessions, being as honest with you as I possibly could, and voicing my concerns to you. However, your consistent failure to be mindful of key specifics in my life, such as traumatic and defining events, has proven to me that if we were to continue, our work together would be fraught by the same trust issues which would only compound over time. Therefore, I cannot see any sense in continuing a process which is just not going to work. In short, you have not yet met my needs, and I am convinced that you never will.

It’s my hope that you will not attempt to contact me in any way. The balance of fees I owe you up to and through our last session, which was held on May 30, 2007, I promise to pay as promptly as I am able. I regret having to terminate our association in this way, but based on my understanding of your business practice, I feel I have no other choice.

What do you say, did I get my message across? (hee)

Lovely readers, thanks for indulging me. Though I can't predict with any accuracy the subject of my next post, I promise you it will contain absolutely no accounts of dog poop OR whining over bad therapists. Pinky swear.

First of all, love the fetching(s)! I just may have to try a pair myself. Second, thanks for the nail polish, since unpainted nails offend me so--LOL, just kidding--

C--I LOVE LOVE LOVE Big Girl Knits!! Their detailed sock tutorial about made me cry...your shawl looks great!

And 4, way to dump the therapist!! Most of them are so pompous and narcissistic they need a good knocking down every now and again.
love love love the fetching, and your therapist? What a hack. Good for you for getting your point across!

Love the Fetching! Very pretty!

And good for you on dumping the therapist. And for recognizing the fact that she wasn't doing what you needed her to do. So many people stick with what isn't working because of tactics like the ones she uses. I went to one a few times. His opinion seemed to be that he knew what he was doing and I should just keep doing as he said and pay him for visits that weren't accomplishing anything. He didn't really listen to what I was saying. So good for you!

Love your blog and the title is one of the best I've seen!
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